Our modern society places too much emphasis on making more money, and on material consumption. We measure the well being of a society by its average per capita income. People mistook big houses, luxurious cars, and new model cellphones as prerequisite for their wellbeing and happiness. Society as a whole forget that our children are our future, and they should be the focus of our lives. Many parents today cannot afford to spend time with their children because they have busy careers outside the house. In order to compensate for missing time with their children, they buy ever more toys and other gadgets to show their affection.

I wondered if the big piles of toys and gifts really brought their children any good in the long run. I grew up in a Chinese village in the 1950 and 1960s. We did not have any toys at the time. But the children in the neighborhood made toys together. The girls made tables and chairs with yellow clay. The boys made trains, trucks and guns with a black variety of clay. In the process of making these toys, we learned a great deal of cooperating with one another to get things done. I really cherished my childhood for that reason.

Many of my American students assume that poor people in third world countries are miserable because of their lack of material stuff. Occasionally, I tell them my stories to show poor people had a different way of finding happiness, which is different from rich people’s happiness, but which is as meaningful as everybody else.

It does not take much to meet the basic needs to survive in this world: Three good meals a day, decent clothes and shelter. Of course, clean water and clean air is as essential as the food. But in our pursuit for more material stuff, many societies and many people forget our essential needs, like clean air, clean water, and three good meals a day. We should value our children and make sure that they get proper care and upbringing above everything else.

It would be counterproductive if we ignore the upbringing and education of our next generation and put too much of our energy to accumulate more material wealth. I do not have any statistics about China, but according to US government statistics, one out of every four children has some kind of mental disability in the US today. If we do not wake up and take serious measures to deal with the crises our children face today, we will face more problem down the road.

Last summer I was asked to give a talk to parents of school children in my hometown. I advised the parents they should reduce the pressure they place on their children to compete in school. Instead, they should give their children more time to play. Their children will learn better while playing with other children.

I also advised teachers to eliminate homework completely. Instead, they should encourage their students to read as widely as possible outside of school. Teachers and parents should give priority to the health of children rather than their academic performance in school. But one parent and one teacher will not be able to achieve all of the above.

The opinions expressed here do not represent the views of the China Daily website