Kimberly Hazelgrove believes in military protocol.
She was a military intelligence officer when her husband, a native of
Edinburgh, Ind., was killed in a 2004 helicopter crash over Mosul. She knew what
to expect — knew the possibilities.
She also knew exactly why officers in dress uniforms came to her door. It was
a reality of a soldier's life at war, one she and her husband both recognized
before he deployed to Iraq with the Army's 10th Mountain Division.
Instead of focusing on the loss, though, Hazelgrove considers what fortune
she can in the circumstances around his death — she was home sick the week
before her husband was killed and was able to speak to him daily on the
telephone.
"I generally didn't get to do that," she said.
Hazelgrove has since left the military, and moved from Fort Drum, N.Y., to
Lorton, Va., to work and raise her family.
"I don't survive. I live," Hazelgrove, 32, said. "I live every day for me and
my children."
With the sternness of a military mom, she has kept their lives stable,
remaining in the military for a year after her husband was killed. She
surrounded the family with supportive friends to keep life from unraveling
uncontrollably.
Even now, she is stern with her children, now 2 and 5.
"I teach them life is not fair, and sometimes you have to make it through the
really bad times, but it only makes us stronger," Hazelgrove said.
Her 5-year-old son Brandon answers his mother quickly when she asks where is
daddy is.
"My daddy is heaven with Jesus," the boy says loudly. "He died in a
helicopter."
